News

It's Your Eulogy

  • Published
  • By Lt. Col. Marc Deshaies
  • 14th Flying Training Wing Director of Staff
COLUMBUS AIR FORCE BASE, Miss. --  As Director of Staff, I am not a commander, but I do have the opportunity and privilege to work alongside every commander at Columbus Air Force Base. I have also had the honor of working with young enlisted and junior officers in one of the busiest wings in the U.S. Air Force. One question asked by most young Airmen is, "what do I need to do to get ahead?" I have compiled what I find to be my top five responses, applicable to both officer and enlisted, to navigate through this Air Force.

1) A good attitude- describing it would be difficult, but you know when it turns bad. Often times, you might be the only one who can provide a "good" attitude or silver lining to an otherwise dismal situation. Anyone can have a bad attitude, but the following quote by author and radio host Dr. Charles Swindoll can help put attitude into perspective:

"The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company...a church...a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past...we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude...I am convinced that life is 10 percent what happens to me and 90 percent how I react to it. And so it is with you...we are in charge of our attitudes."

2) A healthy balance between work and home- Much like attitude, it's hard to see the balance but you know when it's off. In 2005, one story changed my life, and how I viewed my balance. A friend of mine was at a garage sale in Fayetteville, North Carolina and said:

I saw a crate of decorations from an Army veteran. There were silver stars, purple hearts and several personal letters from all kinds of generals. I asked, "Whose are these?" thinking the owner would immediately brag about their loved one. The answer, "They're my dad's. He left my mom and me for the Army 30 years ago. You can have them for $5." 

Where was the balance?  The legacy left behind did not include the family; instead, it was a career fit in a crate worth no more than $5. So take care of one another, let your wingman know when only one of his or her baskets is full of eggs and moments away from an omelet.

3) Good communication- Vital to promoting good order and discipline at every level in the chain.  By keeping everyone informed and having an open dialogue, leaders and followers become more "in the know" and effective at ensuring standards are met. When the health of the unit is suffering due to an Airman's missteps and mistakes, a good leader will provide fairness and consistency when rendering disciplinary actions.  

4) Don't look to be offended- The Airmen I have enjoyed working with the most are the ones who minimize drama, always giving the benefit of the doubt and choosing not to be offended. Why? Because being offended is often a choice. If the words are overtly offensive, approach the individual and elevate only when appropriate. 

5) Protect your good name- it is worth more than any stratification or distinguished graduate. Your name will follow you throughout this small Air Force. Don't sacrifice it or a peer to get a smaller numerator. Don't negotiate for a better stratification, earn the stratification. The three ways to best accomplish this are: Keep your boss out of trouble, elevate your peers, and take care of your subordinates.  

Rather than recap, let me just ask, "In the end, what will be your legacy?" How will your family and peers best remember you at your eulogy? I doubt you will hear the words: Stratification, formal complaint or negative attitude. Instead, I believe if you use this list as a guide, your legacy will last, and your funeral will be standing room only with all those denominators you helped along the way.